Some Ideas On How To Deal With Bullying

By Nelda Powers


Bullying is a problem that most of us have had to deal with in one part of our lives or the other. For a good number of people, it is a constant problem that they have to face every day. Bullying can be defined as the repeated act of aggressive behaviour to dominate others. It can be in form of mockery, threats, abuse and coercion towards particular targets. It has been linked to variation in gender, physique, class, religion; race, just to name a few. Bullying is one of the factors contributing to increased suicide cases especially among teens. As a result, various movements and laws have been created on how to deal with bullying.

There are three basic types of abuse as regards this vice. These are emotional, physical and verbal abuse. Within the three categories, there exists physical violence, insults, coercion and intimidation. There is some differences in the manner in which abuse is perpetrated in the female and the male genders. This behaviour in females is associated with emotional abuse while male tend to be more physically aggressive. In isolated cases, both sexes may choose mockery such as when the victim looks more masculine or when both parties are adults who do not want to be considered immature.

The vice may be classified as either indirect (social aggression) or direct. The aim of bullies in the indirect form is to make the victim feel lonely. They do this by gossiping about the target, laughing at them, calling them names and even staring at them. Direct bullies openly take advantage of individuals by pushing and pulling, shoving, biting, and pinching among others

What exactly is the motive behind this kind of aggressive behaviour? Studies indicate that most bullies are weak at heart and would rather disguise their weakness by forcing it on others. Such people lack self esteem or may have been gone through the same a similar experience at some point in their life. Others learn this act from people that are close to them.

One of the other common causes of this undesirable behaviour is a personality disorder. The common forms of personalities seen are temperamental, obsessive or an excessive concern about a self-image. If they are of school attending age, they usually perform rather poorly compared to their colleagues. Within a social group, they want to be regarded with fear and respect.

There are many negative effects associated with this problem including depression and a feeling of loneliness. The victims also have their self-esteem lowered markedly and start to lose interest in life activities. In extremes, it may lead to post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD. The victims become bitter and may themselves become violent in future. If one manages to stand up to a bully, they gain a lot of respect in return.

Parents, teachers and guardians are encouraged to attend anti bullying training programs to be help children cope. Schools can also come up with policies and peer counseling sessions. The state can actively participate by instituting laws against such behaviour.

Targets can be able to deal with bullying by being on the defensive rather than feeling inferior. This can only be possible when one puts on a positive attitude towards the situation. Bullies prefer weak people and can only retreat when they have been confidently challenged.




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